(no subject)

On Tuesday when I went into work there was a note for me from the home manager saying she wanted to see me on Friday. The note didn't say what it was about. So I'm a bit nervous. Could be about my ninty days and be an evaluation. That be really good because then I can start earning personal time. Only concern is that maybe I did something wrong and she's going to talk to me about it. Can't think of what it could be though. I'm nervous.

Found out something today that has thrown me for a loop. My mom has epilepsy and the meds she took to control it when she was pregnant with me could've cause me to have brain damage or cleft-lip, I could've died. I didn't have any of those things, I was lucky. The only thing I do have is teeth that constantly had to be worked on because I wasn't born to with the same amount that most people have, I have too few. I actually am going to be keeping the two wisdom teeth that are coming in because of this. When I asked her about this the explantion I got was that was why she switched meds when she found out she was pregnant with my brother, which had left me with the question why didn't she switch meds when she found out she was pregnant with me? I never understood that, why would a person continually take medication that they knew was going to damage their child if another option was available? Today I found out that it was the doctors who switched her meds for my brother. I also found out that the doctors wanted her to abort me. She and my father obviously decided not to. It's thrown me, why not tell me this? Why wait nearly twenty-two years to find this out, and off a comment from my great-aunt? It's just weird. I found out today that it was recommended to my parents by professionals that I shouldn't be here. I know I should be happy, grateful that I'm here and with only a minor problem that was fixed with four years of braces. Instead I'm weirded out and a little sad. I'm not going to write anything more on this right now, because I wouldn't be able to without sounding cliche.

Time to deflect, ignore my silly inner turmoil and read this news article:

http://news.yahoo.com/news?tmpl=story&u=/nm/20050512/pl_nm/security_usa_koran_dc

(no subject)

On Tuesday when I went into work there was a note for me from the home manager saying she wanted to see me on Friday. The note didn't say what it was about. So I'm a bit nervous. Could be about my ninty days and be an evaluation. That be really good because then I can start earning personal time. Only concern is that maybe I did something wrong and she's going to talk to me about it. Can't think of what it could be though. I'm nervous.

Found out something today that has thrown me for a loop. My mom has epilepsy and the meds she took to control it when she was pregnant with me could've cause me to have brain damage or cleft-lip, I could've died. I didn't have any of those things, I was lucky. The only thing I do have is teeth that constantly had to be worked on because I wasn't born to with the same amount that most people have, I have too few. I actually am going to be keeping the two wisdom teeth that are coming in because of this. When I asked her about this the explantion I got was that was why she switched meds when she found out she was pregnant with my brother, which had left me with the question why didn't she switch meds when she found out she was pregnant with me? I never understood that, why would a person continually take medication that they knew was going to damage their child if another option was available? Today I found out that it was the doctors who switched her meds for my brother. I also found out that the doctors wanted her to abort me. She and my father obviously decided not to. It's thrown me, why not tell me this? Why wait nearly twenty-two years to find this out, and off a comment from my great-aunt? It's just weird. I found out today that it was recommended to my parents by professionals that I shouldn't be here. I know I should be happy, grateful that I'm here and with only a minor problem that was fixed with four years of braces. Instead I'm weirded out and a little sad. I'm not going to write anything more on this right now, because I wouldn't be able to without sounding cliche.

Time to deflect, ignore my silly inner turmoil and read this news article:

http://news.yahoo.com/news?tmpl=story&u=/nm/20050512/pl_nm/security_usa_koran_dc