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Ever watch 210 of Queer as Folk, the US version? It’s the one where Michael’s hero Captain Astro, a comic book character, meets his demise and he has to deal with his emotional fallout. I'd sympathized with Michael and could see where he was coming from, but never thought I’d be going through the same thing.
When I was a child I wanted to read comic books. I grew up on Batman and Robin. My brother and I would watch it everyday after school and afterwards, when we got home, we’d fashion capes out of blankets and run around the house defeating bad guys. He was always Batman, I was always Robin.
My first two comics were in the Batman line. One was a Robin and the other was a movie adaptation. I wanted more, I was ready to be hooked, but it was made very clear that to me that comics were for boys.
My love for the X-men cartoon caused worry for my mother. She bought me the X-men t-shirt I begged for, but made it very clear that it was a guy thing and I shouldn’t be as enamored with as I was, so I kept my mouth shut about wanting comics and simply longed for them. I’d sit with a group of boys at lunch and hungrily listen to them excitedly go over every detail of what was currently happening in comics. They thought I was cool enough to hang out at their table because I knew enough about the X-men characters through the cartoon to seem like I read the comics.
I bought a few Angel comics for the covers when a friend got me into BTVS, but never read them. I used them for collages instead. Don’t cring, I’ve since replaced them in my collection.
Then when I was eighteen I moved out of my parent’s house and into my Grandma’s. I also began to come out and started seeing a woman I worked with. I was still having a hard time accepting myself. Then I bought some comic books, the X-men I’d longed for in my youth. This was around the time of the “Eve of Destruction” arc and in that arc I met a character, Jean-Paul Beaubier aka Northstar. He was at his first book signing, his autobiography entitled Born Normal. At the book signing a man tried to kill him for being gay and a mutant. Using his super speed he quickly dismantled the weapon and went on signing books, not letting the man’s bigotry stop him. Then Jean Grey showed up asking for his help, the world of course was in peril and she needed to quickly put a new team together to rescue them and save the world from Magneto. He was snarky in his refusal, but of course he ended up dropping his book tour for her and joined.
Jean also recruited other mutants for this endeavor one of them being Paulie, who was very homophobic towards Jean-Paul. Jean-Paul didn’t put up with it and eventually proved to himself to his teammate.
Needless to say I was hooked. I’d needed a role model, someone I could look up to, who wasn’t ashamed of who they were, and I’d found one simply by opening a comic book.
My favorite character from the cartoon had been Jubliee, I have to admit that I’ve had a bit of a crush on her since I was thirteen. So of course I read Generation X and began to collect back issues of those along with searching for anything that had Northstar in it. Generation X ended and I’d become attached to the character of Chamber and he was the one they moved to the main X-title. Long story short I didn’t like the storyline, stopped reading the current books and stuck to back issues.
Then I found out that Jean-Paul was in the current book, had been brought in to be a regular member. I started reading again and despite the poor writing I enjoyed the few glimpses of the character I knew. There are only so many times your favorite character can say, “I’m gay,” before it gets redundant, especially when there are so many other aspects of his personality that could’ve be explored.
He was basically dropped out of sight, explained in that he was only ‘teaching classes’ when Marvel went through Reloaded. I drifted away from the books, occasionally looking in if one of my three favorite characters was making an appearance. I’d also discovered other characters I found myself relating to so I was again looking for back issues.
Then I read a spoiler, an upcoming appearance of one of my favorite characters.
I can safely say I’m done with Marvel. I’ll find my comic enjoyment elsewhere. It was bad enough when Jean-Paul was made to say he had no love life. He’s a self-made, very rich, handsome man, doesn’t it seem unrealistic for his only romantic storyline to be an unrequited crush on a supposedly heterosexual character?
Marvel’s fallen into an old cinematic cliché. One viewing of The Celluloid Closet and you’ll know what I’m referring to; actually no go rent five gay movies and most will probably end the same way. I didn’t think it could happen to Northstar. I’d thought that his being Marvel’s only out male gay character (Karma is their out gay female character) would keep him safe from this cliché.
Well I was wrong.
I understand that this up coming storyline wasn’t done in malice by the writer and that it’s not intended to be homophobic. Yet to me, it remains the straw that broke the camel’s back in a line of bad handling of my favorite character.
I find it extremely disheartening to continually find discrimination in a product whose main long-standing storyline has been to protest bigotry.
Yes, I understand that its fiction and that’s one of the reason’s I can walk away. I don’t have to buy this product to go on living. I don’t even have to buy the issue where they’re going to kill him. At the same time, I’m losing a friend. I’m losing a role model. I’m losing a character that helped me smile on days when I didn’t think I had any smiles left. I’m losing the person that made me realize that it was okay to be myself, that there was nothing wrong with me.
In a world that sometimes hates and fears me for an aspect of myself that I have no control over, it was nice to have Jean-Paul to relate to. I'll sincerely miss him.
When I was a child I wanted to read comic books. I grew up on Batman and Robin. My brother and I would watch it everyday after school and afterwards, when we got home, we’d fashion capes out of blankets and run around the house defeating bad guys. He was always Batman, I was always Robin.
My first two comics were in the Batman line. One was a Robin and the other was a movie adaptation. I wanted more, I was ready to be hooked, but it was made very clear that to me that comics were for boys.
My love for the X-men cartoon caused worry for my mother. She bought me the X-men t-shirt I begged for, but made it very clear that it was a guy thing and I shouldn’t be as enamored with as I was, so I kept my mouth shut about wanting comics and simply longed for them. I’d sit with a group of boys at lunch and hungrily listen to them excitedly go over every detail of what was currently happening in comics. They thought I was cool enough to hang out at their table because I knew enough about the X-men characters through the cartoon to seem like I read the comics.
I bought a few Angel comics for the covers when a friend got me into BTVS, but never read them. I used them for collages instead. Don’t cring, I’ve since replaced them in my collection.
Then when I was eighteen I moved out of my parent’s house and into my Grandma’s. I also began to come out and started seeing a woman I worked with. I was still having a hard time accepting myself. Then I bought some comic books, the X-men I’d longed for in my youth. This was around the time of the “Eve of Destruction” arc and in that arc I met a character, Jean-Paul Beaubier aka Northstar. He was at his first book signing, his autobiography entitled Born Normal. At the book signing a man tried to kill him for being gay and a mutant. Using his super speed he quickly dismantled the weapon and went on signing books, not letting the man’s bigotry stop him. Then Jean Grey showed up asking for his help, the world of course was in peril and she needed to quickly put a new team together to rescue them and save the world from Magneto. He was snarky in his refusal, but of course he ended up dropping his book tour for her and joined.
Jean also recruited other mutants for this endeavor one of them being Paulie, who was very homophobic towards Jean-Paul. Jean-Paul didn’t put up with it and eventually proved to himself to his teammate.
Needless to say I was hooked. I’d needed a role model, someone I could look up to, who wasn’t ashamed of who they were, and I’d found one simply by opening a comic book.
My favorite character from the cartoon had been Jubliee, I have to admit that I’ve had a bit of a crush on her since I was thirteen. So of course I read Generation X and began to collect back issues of those along with searching for anything that had Northstar in it. Generation X ended and I’d become attached to the character of Chamber and he was the one they moved to the main X-title. Long story short I didn’t like the storyline, stopped reading the current books and stuck to back issues.
Then I found out that Jean-Paul was in the current book, had been brought in to be a regular member. I started reading again and despite the poor writing I enjoyed the few glimpses of the character I knew. There are only so many times your favorite character can say, “I’m gay,” before it gets redundant, especially when there are so many other aspects of his personality that could’ve be explored.
He was basically dropped out of sight, explained in that he was only ‘teaching classes’ when Marvel went through Reloaded. I drifted away from the books, occasionally looking in if one of my three favorite characters was making an appearance. I’d also discovered other characters I found myself relating to so I was again looking for back issues.
Then I read a spoiler, an upcoming appearance of one of my favorite characters.
I can safely say I’m done with Marvel. I’ll find my comic enjoyment elsewhere. It was bad enough when Jean-Paul was made to say he had no love life. He’s a self-made, very rich, handsome man, doesn’t it seem unrealistic for his only romantic storyline to be an unrequited crush on a supposedly heterosexual character?
Marvel’s fallen into an old cinematic cliché. One viewing of The Celluloid Closet and you’ll know what I’m referring to; actually no go rent five gay movies and most will probably end the same way. I didn’t think it could happen to Northstar. I’d thought that his being Marvel’s only out male gay character (Karma is their out gay female character) would keep him safe from this cliché.
Well I was wrong.
I understand that this up coming storyline wasn’t done in malice by the writer and that it’s not intended to be homophobic. Yet to me, it remains the straw that broke the camel’s back in a line of bad handling of my favorite character.
I find it extremely disheartening to continually find discrimination in a product whose main long-standing storyline has been to protest bigotry.
Yes, I understand that its fiction and that’s one of the reason’s I can walk away. I don’t have to buy this product to go on living. I don’t even have to buy the issue where they’re going to kill him. At the same time, I’m losing a friend. I’m losing a role model. I’m losing a character that helped me smile on days when I didn’t think I had any smiles left. I’m losing the person that made me realize that it was okay to be myself, that there was nothing wrong with me.
In a world that sometimes hates and fears me for an aspect of myself that I have no control over, it was nice to have Jean-Paul to relate to. I'll sincerely miss him.
