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Title: Assurance
Fandom: Legends of Tomorrow
Pairings: John Constantine/Gary Green, John Constantine & Zari Tomaz
Disclaimer: I own nothing to do with DC. It's not my toy box and I'm merely playing.
Rating: PG-13
Summary: S4. Post Legends of To-Meow-Meow. The team is celebrating New Year's Eve together. Zari, with a little help from Mick, convinced John to go and talk to Gary.
A/N: Thanks to the Constangreen discord, you guys are awesome! There is some minor background Sara/Ava and Nora/Ray. There is one kiss between Mick and John as well.
Assurance:
When the door to his room opens John expects Sara to be standing there attempting to entice him to join the team in a New Year’s celebration. Instead Zari stands there looking entirely too sure of herself.
“Not interested in your little party to make Ray and Nora feel less awkward,” he stalls. She’s going to talk him into this, he can tell by the way she’s looking at him.
She crosses her arms and arches an eyebrow.
“Could drop me off somewhere, let me find my own fun,” he suggests.
“Back to the ‘I don’t team,’ you’re better than that John.”
“I’m not really,” he sighs, putting down the book he was reading and sitting on the side of his bed. He sets the book on his nightstand. “Is everyone going to be pairing up by the end of the night?”
“Sara wants to give Ava a kiss at midnight, Nora and Ray are still being Nora and Ray,” Zari shrugs. “Mick’s still upset with Nate for leaving. Charlie will probably bond with Nora. Gary will be there.”
It’s the soft way she points out Gary’s presence that causes him to stand and cross his arms. “What do you think you’re getting at?”
“You told the team about Neron and Desmond, maybe it’s time you told him.”
“And what good would that do?” he grouses. He misses Gary, he shouldn’t, he has no right to, but he does. “Think he deserves better.”
“I think that’s his decision to make,” she points out.
John frowns at her. She stands in his doorway, meeting his eyes, and not backing down. He wants to lash out at her, but she doesn’t deserve that and he knows that she’d call him on it. He sighs, “What good would that do? So he gets the whole sob story about why I’m not emotionally available? I wasn’t before. I’m not after. What does that lead to, my losing him too?”
He’s already lost Gary, but at least he’s lost Gary knowing he’s alive.
“You were friends. How long were you guys hunting that dragon together? Was him dying something you considered when you had him dressed up like you serving as a decoy?”
“Think you might be inferring that I…” John starts to growl out, then pauses and makes himself take a breath as he breaks eye contact. He stares at his floor.
“All that time and you didn’t have sex with him,” Zari continues. “Did you after the unicorn?”
John can’t help the wistful smile, “Thoroughly.”
“Okay, more than I needed to know,” she teases.
“Then I fed him the same line I feed everyone that gets too attached.”
“Do you miss everyone you feed that line to?” she pushes.
John runs a hand down his face. “That doesn’t mean I go to your little party, pour out my heart, kiss him at midnight, and everything is all magically healed.”
“You’re allowed to have friends John, it doesn’t mean you’ve given up on Desmond.”
“Moving on does.” John frowns at the words, he meant to point out that he has the team. He’s accepted having the team. He’s accepted being a member of the team. He shouldn’t need more.
“Oh,” she says slowly, as if it’s just dawning on her how much he misses Gary. “Not just friends then.”
He glares, starts to protest and then just glares.
“Not just sex either.”
“What do you want Zari?” he challenges. She’s going to talk him into going and then he’ll see Gary and possibly ruin another man’s life.
“Me? I’d love to be eating a donut right now, but here I am attempting to talk sense into you instead.”
“Have fun at your little soiree,” he encourages as he leans back against his bed and crosses his arms.
She makes a considering noise before she glances down the hall and calls out, “Hey Mick?”
“What?”
“I need a favor.”
Great she’s going to try and get Mick to cart him there. He smirks at her, that’s not going to work.
“What’s the favor?” Mick grumbles suspiciously.
“Gary could use a kiss at midnight, but John’s decided he’d rather pout in his room all night instead.”
John shakes his head at her. There is no way Mick is going to kiss Gary. John’s eyes widen as Mick strides into his room, closes the distance between them, and pulls him into a kiss. He grips Mick’s shirt and kisses back. He’s been wanting one since Mick decided to stay on the ship for the mission with the Fairy Godmother. He’s poked, prodded, and tossed out nicknames, but Zari’s words and a promise of kissing Gary is what gets Mick to kiss him like this? It’s filthy and lingering. John doesn’t know what to do with the way it makes his head spin. As he pushes himself closer Mick pulls back. John gapes. Mick steps back again.
“What was that for?”
As he leaves Mick answers, “To give to your nerd.”
“You know Mick has a thing for nerds, right?” Zari teases in a soft voice.
John whines. What was that? Why did that just happened? He follows Mick out into the hallway and calls out, “He’s not my nerd!”
“Right, right,” Mick disagrees as he keeps walking.
John stares wide eyed as Mick keeps walking. He’s not sure if he’s jealous at the thought of Mick kissing Gary like that, no he’s jealous, but he’s also turned on and he really would rather he be the one kissing Gary. He tugs at his hair and sends a questioning look to Zari. She shrugs.
“You are an evil, evil, woman,” he manages.
“No, I’m not.”
“No, you’re not,” he agrees.
He goes. He does not get dressed up. They’re all gathered in Nora’s cell anyway, there’s no reason to be dressed up. There’s a table with food and drinks. Ray has set up a lap top so they can watch the ball drop. Ava and Mick share an undecipherable look over the small collection of books on Nora’s book shelf. Nora is chatting with Ray. Ava breaks off to catch up with Sara. Nate pulls Mick out into the hallway. Zari loads up a plate and takes it back to the ship. Charlie isn’t going to set a foot in the Time Bureau after the last time she was here. John’s not sure what to think, he was sure those two were still sniping at each other. Gary is chatting with Wally and a young woman, Mona. John stays on the periphery, trying not to be uncomfortable with the memory of being in one of these cells. He shifts closer to Gary when Mick comes back in with Nate.
Mick perches on the bed sipping his beer while Nate heads over the food table. John can tell by the way Nate is eyeing him that he’s about to be pulled into the group. Maybe he should just head back to the ship?
He feels himself relax when Gary breaks off from his group, pauses to stay something to Nate, picks up some cookies and heads over. John takes one when it’s offered. He wants to lean in to Gary, but he’s not sure Gary would welcome him.
“Not up for socializing?” Gary asks. He’s smiling, that smile he almost always has on his face. There’s a slight strain behind it, one’s John’s learned to recognize.
“Zari pointed out I’m an ass and…” John pauses, let the excuses wither on his lips and instead confesses. “I’m an ass.”
“You were nice to me,” Gary contradicts. “Okay the whole ‘breaking up with me’ when I thought we were friends kinda sucked, but…”
“Friends?”
“You were pretty clear up front that you just wanted to be friends. It’s not your fault that I liked you more than that.”
John shoves the cookie in his mouth so he doesn’t contradict Gary. When Gary tilts his head, confusing evident on the way his brow furrows John widens his eyes and tries to look like he’s not shoving food in his mouth to avoid talking.
“Are you okay?”
John shakes his head no and chews.
“Do you want me to leave?”
John grabs Gary’s hand and shakes his head again swallowing. The beer in his hand isn’t going to taste good after that cookie, but he takes a swift swallow anyway. Gary squeezes his hand, lets John intertwine their fingers. John leans in and rests his head on Gary’s shoulder, breathes him in for a moment to steady himself. Gary’s fingers brush the back of his hair line and that’s it, that’s what undoes him. He shifts so he can look Gary in the eyes, even as he keeps his voice low, “Do you know what it was like telling myself that? Keeping my hands to myself? Not kissing you every time I wanted to? I thought I’d stay away and then you went and trusted me with a unicorn and you let me take advantage of you afterwards.”
“I wasn’t taken advantage of,” Gary shakes his head. The smiles back, but it reaches his eyes this time. He’s even biting his lip.
John manages to stop himself from shifting closer. “I used you as bait.”
“Was there anyone else you could’ve used?” Gary asks. “You and the rest of the Legends were there to keep me safe.”
John shakes his head, “You trusted me and a part of you ended up in hell.”
Gary just smiles, “You know I don’t actually believe in hell, right?”
“What?”
“A reality that is hell-like sure, but literal actual hell no,” Gary shrugs.
John stares. “You don’t hate me?”
“No. I was hurt, but I don’t hate you.”
“I don’t want you to get hurt.” John swallows. “I don’t want it to be my fault you’re hurt.”
Zari’s right. She didn’t even stay at this party she’s made him come to and she was right.
“I ask too much and I’m not going to be around much,” he stalls.
“Well, you’re a Legend now so you kinda have to go where they’re going,” Gary reasons.
“You can visit.”
Gary actually has the ability to visit. Ava visits all the time.
“You’d want me to visit?”
They’re still holding hands. John squeeze’s Gary’s hand. He can feel the panic that he’ll lose this too building, but he manages to say, “More than visit.”
Gary kisses him and John sinks into the feeling, letting it sooth him. He’s been missing this. He pulls Gary closer and smiles when Gary’s hand cup his face, fingers edging into his hair. He grips Gary’s hand with his free one and wishes he could put his beer down. He licks his lips when they part.
“I…” John starts. “I need to tell you everything. It’s not fair to you if I don’t.”
It wasn’t fair to Gary that he hadn’t before. He hadn’t even been ready to say the words out loud then, but facing a broken reality again and again and having to piece things back together meant telling the rest of the Legends why he’d joined them and Gary deserves to know too.
“Okay,” Gary agrees. He’s back to looking at John with concern, but there’s still caring in his eyes.
“Can I kiss you again first?”
Gary answers by closing the distance between them. John ignores that someone is making a happy noise behind them. He ignores the chatter around them. He pulls Gary close. They’ve got a lot to talk about and Gary might still decide that John and his baggage aren’t worth sticking around for, but John’s going to at least offer him that decision this time. He’s going to try.
Fandom: Legends of Tomorrow
Pairings: John Constantine/Gary Green, John Constantine & Zari Tomaz
Disclaimer: I own nothing to do with DC. It's not my toy box and I'm merely playing.
Rating: PG-13
Summary: S4. Post Legends of To-Meow-Meow. The team is celebrating New Year's Eve together. Zari, with a little help from Mick, convinced John to go and talk to Gary.
A/N: Thanks to the Constangreen discord, you guys are awesome! There is some minor background Sara/Ava and Nora/Ray. There is one kiss between Mick and John as well.
Assurance:
When the door to his room opens John expects Sara to be standing there attempting to entice him to join the team in a New Year’s celebration. Instead Zari stands there looking entirely too sure of herself.
“Not interested in your little party to make Ray and Nora feel less awkward,” he stalls. She’s going to talk him into this, he can tell by the way she’s looking at him.
She crosses her arms and arches an eyebrow.
“Could drop me off somewhere, let me find my own fun,” he suggests.
“Back to the ‘I don’t team,’ you’re better than that John.”
“I’m not really,” he sighs, putting down the book he was reading and sitting on the side of his bed. He sets the book on his nightstand. “Is everyone going to be pairing up by the end of the night?”
“Sara wants to give Ava a kiss at midnight, Nora and Ray are still being Nora and Ray,” Zari shrugs. “Mick’s still upset with Nate for leaving. Charlie will probably bond with Nora. Gary will be there.”
It’s the soft way she points out Gary’s presence that causes him to stand and cross his arms. “What do you think you’re getting at?”
“You told the team about Neron and Desmond, maybe it’s time you told him.”
“And what good would that do?” he grouses. He misses Gary, he shouldn’t, he has no right to, but he does. “Think he deserves better.”
“I think that’s his decision to make,” she points out.
John frowns at her. She stands in his doorway, meeting his eyes, and not backing down. He wants to lash out at her, but she doesn’t deserve that and he knows that she’d call him on it. He sighs, “What good would that do? So he gets the whole sob story about why I’m not emotionally available? I wasn’t before. I’m not after. What does that lead to, my losing him too?”
He’s already lost Gary, but at least he’s lost Gary knowing he’s alive.
“You were friends. How long were you guys hunting that dragon together? Was him dying something you considered when you had him dressed up like you serving as a decoy?”
“Think you might be inferring that I…” John starts to growl out, then pauses and makes himself take a breath as he breaks eye contact. He stares at his floor.
“All that time and you didn’t have sex with him,” Zari continues. “Did you after the unicorn?”
John can’t help the wistful smile, “Thoroughly.”
“Okay, more than I needed to know,” she teases.
“Then I fed him the same line I feed everyone that gets too attached.”
“Do you miss everyone you feed that line to?” she pushes.
John runs a hand down his face. “That doesn’t mean I go to your little party, pour out my heart, kiss him at midnight, and everything is all magically healed.”
“You’re allowed to have friends John, it doesn’t mean you’ve given up on Desmond.”
“Moving on does.” John frowns at the words, he meant to point out that he has the team. He’s accepted having the team. He’s accepted being a member of the team. He shouldn’t need more.
“Oh,” she says slowly, as if it’s just dawning on her how much he misses Gary. “Not just friends then.”
He glares, starts to protest and then just glares.
“Not just sex either.”
“What do you want Zari?” he challenges. She’s going to talk him into going and then he’ll see Gary and possibly ruin another man’s life.
“Me? I’d love to be eating a donut right now, but here I am attempting to talk sense into you instead.”
“Have fun at your little soiree,” he encourages as he leans back against his bed and crosses his arms.
She makes a considering noise before she glances down the hall and calls out, “Hey Mick?”
“What?”
“I need a favor.”
Great she’s going to try and get Mick to cart him there. He smirks at her, that’s not going to work.
“What’s the favor?” Mick grumbles suspiciously.
“Gary could use a kiss at midnight, but John’s decided he’d rather pout in his room all night instead.”
John shakes his head at her. There is no way Mick is going to kiss Gary. John’s eyes widen as Mick strides into his room, closes the distance between them, and pulls him into a kiss. He grips Mick’s shirt and kisses back. He’s been wanting one since Mick decided to stay on the ship for the mission with the Fairy Godmother. He’s poked, prodded, and tossed out nicknames, but Zari’s words and a promise of kissing Gary is what gets Mick to kiss him like this? It’s filthy and lingering. John doesn’t know what to do with the way it makes his head spin. As he pushes himself closer Mick pulls back. John gapes. Mick steps back again.
“What was that for?”
As he leaves Mick answers, “To give to your nerd.”
“You know Mick has a thing for nerds, right?” Zari teases in a soft voice.
John whines. What was that? Why did that just happened? He follows Mick out into the hallway and calls out, “He’s not my nerd!”
“Right, right,” Mick disagrees as he keeps walking.
John stares wide eyed as Mick keeps walking. He’s not sure if he’s jealous at the thought of Mick kissing Gary like that, no he’s jealous, but he’s also turned on and he really would rather he be the one kissing Gary. He tugs at his hair and sends a questioning look to Zari. She shrugs.
“You are an evil, evil, woman,” he manages.
“No, I’m not.”
“No, you’re not,” he agrees.
He goes. He does not get dressed up. They’re all gathered in Nora’s cell anyway, there’s no reason to be dressed up. There’s a table with food and drinks. Ray has set up a lap top so they can watch the ball drop. Ava and Mick share an undecipherable look over the small collection of books on Nora’s book shelf. Nora is chatting with Ray. Ava breaks off to catch up with Sara. Nate pulls Mick out into the hallway. Zari loads up a plate and takes it back to the ship. Charlie isn’t going to set a foot in the Time Bureau after the last time she was here. John’s not sure what to think, he was sure those two were still sniping at each other. Gary is chatting with Wally and a young woman, Mona. John stays on the periphery, trying not to be uncomfortable with the memory of being in one of these cells. He shifts closer to Gary when Mick comes back in with Nate.
Mick perches on the bed sipping his beer while Nate heads over the food table. John can tell by the way Nate is eyeing him that he’s about to be pulled into the group. Maybe he should just head back to the ship?
He feels himself relax when Gary breaks off from his group, pauses to stay something to Nate, picks up some cookies and heads over. John takes one when it’s offered. He wants to lean in to Gary, but he’s not sure Gary would welcome him.
“Not up for socializing?” Gary asks. He’s smiling, that smile he almost always has on his face. There’s a slight strain behind it, one’s John’s learned to recognize.
“Zari pointed out I’m an ass and…” John pauses, let the excuses wither on his lips and instead confesses. “I’m an ass.”
“You were nice to me,” Gary contradicts. “Okay the whole ‘breaking up with me’ when I thought we were friends kinda sucked, but…”
“Friends?”
“You were pretty clear up front that you just wanted to be friends. It’s not your fault that I liked you more than that.”
John shoves the cookie in his mouth so he doesn’t contradict Gary. When Gary tilts his head, confusing evident on the way his brow furrows John widens his eyes and tries to look like he’s not shoving food in his mouth to avoid talking.
“Are you okay?”
John shakes his head no and chews.
“Do you want me to leave?”
John grabs Gary’s hand and shakes his head again swallowing. The beer in his hand isn’t going to taste good after that cookie, but he takes a swift swallow anyway. Gary squeezes his hand, lets John intertwine their fingers. John leans in and rests his head on Gary’s shoulder, breathes him in for a moment to steady himself. Gary’s fingers brush the back of his hair line and that’s it, that’s what undoes him. He shifts so he can look Gary in the eyes, even as he keeps his voice low, “Do you know what it was like telling myself that? Keeping my hands to myself? Not kissing you every time I wanted to? I thought I’d stay away and then you went and trusted me with a unicorn and you let me take advantage of you afterwards.”
“I wasn’t taken advantage of,” Gary shakes his head. The smiles back, but it reaches his eyes this time. He’s even biting his lip.
John manages to stop himself from shifting closer. “I used you as bait.”
“Was there anyone else you could’ve used?” Gary asks. “You and the rest of the Legends were there to keep me safe.”
John shakes his head, “You trusted me and a part of you ended up in hell.”
Gary just smiles, “You know I don’t actually believe in hell, right?”
“What?”
“A reality that is hell-like sure, but literal actual hell no,” Gary shrugs.
John stares. “You don’t hate me?”
“No. I was hurt, but I don’t hate you.”
“I don’t want you to get hurt.” John swallows. “I don’t want it to be my fault you’re hurt.”
Zari’s right. She didn’t even stay at this party she’s made him come to and she was right.
“I ask too much and I’m not going to be around much,” he stalls.
“Well, you’re a Legend now so you kinda have to go where they’re going,” Gary reasons.
“You can visit.”
Gary actually has the ability to visit. Ava visits all the time.
“You’d want me to visit?”
They’re still holding hands. John squeeze’s Gary’s hand. He can feel the panic that he’ll lose this too building, but he manages to say, “More than visit.”
Gary kisses him and John sinks into the feeling, letting it sooth him. He’s been missing this. He pulls Gary closer and smiles when Gary’s hand cup his face, fingers edging into his hair. He grips Gary’s hand with his free one and wishes he could put his beer down. He licks his lips when they part.
“I…” John starts. “I need to tell you everything. It’s not fair to you if I don’t.”
It wasn’t fair to Gary that he hadn’t before. He hadn’t even been ready to say the words out loud then, but facing a broken reality again and again and having to piece things back together meant telling the rest of the Legends why he’d joined them and Gary deserves to know too.
“Okay,” Gary agrees. He’s back to looking at John with concern, but there’s still caring in his eyes.
“Can I kiss you again first?”
Gary answers by closing the distance between them. John ignores that someone is making a happy noise behind them. He ignores the chatter around them. He pulls Gary close. They’ve got a lot to talk about and Gary might still decide that John and his baggage aren’t worth sticking around for, but John’s going to at least offer him that decision this time. He’s going to try.
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