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Title: Fragile and Unprovable Things
Fandom: Batman: Wayne Family Adventures
Characters/Pairings: Jason Todd, Damian Wayne
Disclaimer: I own nothing to do with DC. It's not my toy box and I'm merely playing.
Rating: PG-13
Summary: Jason tries to cheer Damian up. He wasn't ready to question what he wants for his future.
A/N: Written for Przed for the 2024 Yuletide. Thank you to midnightclarity for the beta. Title is from Coming Home by Mary Oliver. Jason talks about reading Clockwork Boys by T. Kingfisher.
Fragile and Unprovable Things:
Jason lets his book rest against his chest as he changes his focus to Damian. He doesn't think he's doing a good job of cheering Damian up, but the silence is at least companionable. Actually Jason isn't sure how cheering Damian up is falling to him, especially since he didn't sleep well and is still in a melancholy mood himself. At least they’re in the library? It’s cozy. He’s got his favorite chair and a good book. The rain is making a steady soft noise. Still, Jason hasn't seen even a hint of a smile on Damian’s face all day. Clearly his ‘improve their mood by having a lazy day’ idea is failing.
Damian glances at him, rolls his eyes, and lets his gaze drift back to his sketchbook. He's currently sitting on the floor so he can curl up against Titus, but still prop his sketchbook up using a lapdesk. Alfred the cat is napping on his feet. Jason considers taking a picture. Damian reaches for his eraser, a frown marring his face as he considers his drawing.
Jason lets his fingers drum against his book before he offers, “Read you something?”
Damian pauses to look at him. Jason gives him time to consider this. Eventually Damian shrugs and tells him, “You may.”
Jason snorts. Damian’s lips almost lift, almost. Jason opens his book, scanning to find the part he thought Damian would find amusing. Jason lets his voice take on a more dour tone, it's not difficult, not today, “Have you ever considered giving up killing people and becoming a tailor?”
Jason switches to a gruffer voice, “Oh, yes.”
He goes back to the dour voice, “And?”
He finishes with the gruffer voice, “I don't like people unless I'm stabbing them.”
Damian snorts. Jason glances from the book to him and smiles when he sees that Damian's eyes are half closed in delight. He's also slapping his hand over his mouth as if that will somehow hold in his laugh. Jason reaches for a tab and writes ‘Made Damian laugh’ before placing it carefully in the book.
“What is it?” Damian asks.
“The book or the characters?” Jason attempts to clarify.
“The book,” Damian answers.
Jason holds the book out towards him so Damian can read that it’s Clockwork Boys by T. Kingfisher. Damian glances at it, then up at him. Jason considers launching into an explanation of the book. Damian still primarily reads non-fiction, but is starting to make forays into fiction.
“You’ve been reading…” Damian pauses, then asks, “Gender?”
“Her,” Jason answers.
“You’ve been reading her a lot lately,” Damian comments.
Jason shrugs. “I liked her Saint of Steel series and this is a prequel.”
Damian makes a considering noise before shifting his focus back to his sketchbook. Jason starts to open his book. Then Damian says, “I can understand taking notes or annotating a book you’re studying, but I’m not sure why you do it when it’s one you’re reading for fun.”
It’s almost a question. Jason knows he can not answer since a question wasn’t even posed, especially since they’re talking now and Jason can’t see a way to segue this conversation towards why Damian is in a contemplative mood. Did something happen this weekend while Damian was at the Kent’s farm with Jon? Are Damian and Jon having another argument? No, those tend to be explosive and short-lived, this is a simmering bad mood. Maybe a disagreement with Conner? Jason is about to ask when he notices Damian’s raised eyebrows. Jason sinks back into his chair as he answers, “If I reread a book I like to see if my opinions have changed. I also like to write reviews and participate in discussions about books online, so this helps me organize my thoughts.”
Damian leans in as he considers this. His next question is important, if he’s giving Jason such an obvious tell. Jason rests his book against his chest again.
“Is that something you wanted to do when you were my age?”
Jason isn’t prepared for the way that question sends him reeling. When he was Damian’s age he was in survival mode. Jason knows that Damian will understand that answer better than most, Damian’s been in survival mode himself, even if it was in a different way and for different reasons than Jason. He’ll still understand.
Damian shakes his head. “I phrased that wrong. Sorry. When you were Robin, when Father adopted you, is that something you wanted to do eventually?”
That question feels more reasonable, easier for Jason to pick apart without sinking into the minefield that was his existence before getting adopted by Bruce. Jason drums his fingers against his book as he considers his answer. Jason knows he can deflect if he doesn’t feel like answering. Damian said sorry, even a few months ago he’d have used a more formal word. Jason can bring up slang and move them away from this, but Damian’s leaning towards him, expression intent, and that makes Jason want to parse out a truthful answer. Hesitantly he says, “Maybe? I was excited to graduate high school. I’d started to look at colleges. I thought I wanted to major in English, but I hadn’t fully decided yet.”
“So you didn’t want to continue being a vigilante?”
Jason drums his fingers against his book again and shakes his head. “I didn’t see anyone I could pass the mantle too and I wouldn’t have left Bruce without a Robin, but if I’d graduated he and Alfred would’ve encouraged college.”
“Did you stop wanting to go to college?” Damian pushes.
Jason frowns as he admits, “I haven’t thought about it in awhile.”
“Brown went to college. It’s basically local,” Damian points out.
“Their English program is, there are better places to go if I want to study that, ones that make it easier to move onto graduate school.”
“Different colleges have better programs?” Damian frowns.
Jason shakes his head. “It’s maybe more that different colleges have different specialties?”
Damian sits back as he considers this.
“Do you want to go to college?” Jason asks.
Damian reaches for his eraser again. “I fail to see how that has a bearing on this conversation.”
“What would you want to major in?” Jason prods. “We can look up schools right now.”
“That is unnecessary,” Damian glares.
“Come on, I can live vicariously through you, it’ll be fun!” Jason teases with faux cheer.
Damian rolls his eyes, obviously recognizing the tone Jason is using.
“It’s a moot point if I’m going to become Batman,” Damian points out.
Jason almost points out that Cass will likely have the position covered, or one of the others can step in and cover it if Bruce needs a break and Damian is in school. Except that would almost be like making going to college a task for Damian to maintain his secret identity, and not because he wants the education.
“No expectation of becoming Batman, what would you want to major in?” Jason challenges.
Damian stares at him, then answers carefully, “I’m young. I could easily change my interests between now and then.”
“You already have degrees,” Jason points out. “What’s caught your interest?”
“Jon’s grandparents arranged for me to spend the day following a vet,” Damian answers. “It was…I felt like I learned a lot.”
“And you haven’t had that feeling in awhile?”
Damian opens his mouth to answer, then snaps it closed. He huffs. “Not in the same way. It was satisfying and left me wanting to know more.”
“Then why are we sitting in here when we could be looking up vet programs?”
“My future’s already decided,” Damian protests as he settles back.
Jason wants to point out how young Damian is. Will that even make a difference? Not with Damian. So instead he tries, “We can always ask Steph about balancing college and being a vigilante. You already know how that works with going to school, but she might have a different perspective.”
“I’m not going too…” Damian starts and then pauses. He shakes his head.
“What?” Jason prods. “Share.”
“She’ll probably find reasons we need to visit every zoo, aquarium, and sanctuary in the area,” Damian points out. Damian’s on the verge of wanting that, Jason can tell by his expression. Is there an aquarium nearby? Do they have time to go?
“Not just in the area,” Jason points out. “We’ve got access to means of travel that most people don’t, especially if you include Jon.”
Damian wants that, Jason suspects in a moment Damian is going to find a laptop and start plotting which ones he wants to visit the most. Maybe even make a spreadsheet. Maybe they should get Tim involved? Tim is great at spreadsheets.
“Will,” Damian starts, then stops. He shakes his head. “Would Father be disappointed if I don’t want to be Batman?”
Jason considers giving a flippant response. Does Bruce even want to think about when he’ll have to stop being Batman? “I think he’d rather you be happy, than you feel you’re obligated to be a vigilante.”
Damian considers this a moment, then asks, “Then why aren’t you in college?”
It’s Jason’s turn to snap his mouth shut. He drums his fingers against his book again and stares.
Damian stands and brushes off his pants, then picks up his sketchbook. He turns to look at Jason. “Are we looking up GED programs or colleges for you?”
“I…” Jason starts, then stalls out on his protests because he’s remembering how much he’d wanted college.
“You’re not that much older than me,” Damian points out.
“I’m a decade older than you,” Jason protests.
“I’m ten,” Damian deadpans.
“Almost eleven,” Jason manages.
Damian raises his eyebrows. “I don’t see how that has any bearing at us looking at you going back to school. People decades older than you go back to school and get degrees.”
“That’s true,” Jason concedes.
“Pennyworth isn’t getting any younger though,” Damian continues. “And he was probably looking forward to seeing you graduate, Father too.”
Jason sets his book on the side table he’s put his annotating supplies on. He wants that too. He’d thought wanting Alfred and Bruce at his graduation was a thing for past him, the child he stopped being a long time ago, but Damian is right, that’s something he can still want, that’s something he can still have. It can become one less thing that was taken from him.
Jason manages to nod as he stands. “Yeah, okay. Thanks.”
Damian glances up at him. “You as well. Thank you.”
Jason manages a smile to reflect the soft one Damian is offering. “Let's go find my laptop.”
Fandom: Batman: Wayne Family Adventures
Characters/Pairings: Jason Todd, Damian Wayne
Disclaimer: I own nothing to do with DC. It's not my toy box and I'm merely playing.
Rating: PG-13
Summary: Jason tries to cheer Damian up. He wasn't ready to question what he wants for his future.
A/N: Written for Przed for the 2024 Yuletide. Thank you to midnightclarity for the beta. Title is from Coming Home by Mary Oliver. Jason talks about reading Clockwork Boys by T. Kingfisher.
Fragile and Unprovable Things:
Jason lets his book rest against his chest as he changes his focus to Damian. He doesn't think he's doing a good job of cheering Damian up, but the silence is at least companionable. Actually Jason isn't sure how cheering Damian up is falling to him, especially since he didn't sleep well and is still in a melancholy mood himself. At least they’re in the library? It’s cozy. He’s got his favorite chair and a good book. The rain is making a steady soft noise. Still, Jason hasn't seen even a hint of a smile on Damian’s face all day. Clearly his ‘improve their mood by having a lazy day’ idea is failing.
Damian glances at him, rolls his eyes, and lets his gaze drift back to his sketchbook. He's currently sitting on the floor so he can curl up against Titus, but still prop his sketchbook up using a lapdesk. Alfred the cat is napping on his feet. Jason considers taking a picture. Damian reaches for his eraser, a frown marring his face as he considers his drawing.
Jason lets his fingers drum against his book before he offers, “Read you something?”
Damian pauses to look at him. Jason gives him time to consider this. Eventually Damian shrugs and tells him, “You may.”
Jason snorts. Damian’s lips almost lift, almost. Jason opens his book, scanning to find the part he thought Damian would find amusing. Jason lets his voice take on a more dour tone, it's not difficult, not today, “Have you ever considered giving up killing people and becoming a tailor?”
Jason switches to a gruffer voice, “Oh, yes.”
He goes back to the dour voice, “And?”
He finishes with the gruffer voice, “I don't like people unless I'm stabbing them.”
Damian snorts. Jason glances from the book to him and smiles when he sees that Damian's eyes are half closed in delight. He's also slapping his hand over his mouth as if that will somehow hold in his laugh. Jason reaches for a tab and writes ‘Made Damian laugh’ before placing it carefully in the book.
“What is it?” Damian asks.
“The book or the characters?” Jason attempts to clarify.
“The book,” Damian answers.
Jason holds the book out towards him so Damian can read that it’s Clockwork Boys by T. Kingfisher. Damian glances at it, then up at him. Jason considers launching into an explanation of the book. Damian still primarily reads non-fiction, but is starting to make forays into fiction.
“You’ve been reading…” Damian pauses, then asks, “Gender?”
“Her,” Jason answers.
“You’ve been reading her a lot lately,” Damian comments.
Jason shrugs. “I liked her Saint of Steel series and this is a prequel.”
Damian makes a considering noise before shifting his focus back to his sketchbook. Jason starts to open his book. Then Damian says, “I can understand taking notes or annotating a book you’re studying, but I’m not sure why you do it when it’s one you’re reading for fun.”
It’s almost a question. Jason knows he can not answer since a question wasn’t even posed, especially since they’re talking now and Jason can’t see a way to segue this conversation towards why Damian is in a contemplative mood. Did something happen this weekend while Damian was at the Kent’s farm with Jon? Are Damian and Jon having another argument? No, those tend to be explosive and short-lived, this is a simmering bad mood. Maybe a disagreement with Conner? Jason is about to ask when he notices Damian’s raised eyebrows. Jason sinks back into his chair as he answers, “If I reread a book I like to see if my opinions have changed. I also like to write reviews and participate in discussions about books online, so this helps me organize my thoughts.”
Damian leans in as he considers this. His next question is important, if he’s giving Jason such an obvious tell. Jason rests his book against his chest again.
“Is that something you wanted to do when you were my age?”
Jason isn’t prepared for the way that question sends him reeling. When he was Damian’s age he was in survival mode. Jason knows that Damian will understand that answer better than most, Damian’s been in survival mode himself, even if it was in a different way and for different reasons than Jason. He’ll still understand.
Damian shakes his head. “I phrased that wrong. Sorry. When you were Robin, when Father adopted you, is that something you wanted to do eventually?”
That question feels more reasonable, easier for Jason to pick apart without sinking into the minefield that was his existence before getting adopted by Bruce. Jason drums his fingers against his book as he considers his answer. Jason knows he can deflect if he doesn’t feel like answering. Damian said sorry, even a few months ago he’d have used a more formal word. Jason can bring up slang and move them away from this, but Damian’s leaning towards him, expression intent, and that makes Jason want to parse out a truthful answer. Hesitantly he says, “Maybe? I was excited to graduate high school. I’d started to look at colleges. I thought I wanted to major in English, but I hadn’t fully decided yet.”
“So you didn’t want to continue being a vigilante?”
Jason drums his fingers against his book again and shakes his head. “I didn’t see anyone I could pass the mantle too and I wouldn’t have left Bruce without a Robin, but if I’d graduated he and Alfred would’ve encouraged college.”
“Did you stop wanting to go to college?” Damian pushes.
Jason frowns as he admits, “I haven’t thought about it in awhile.”
“Brown went to college. It’s basically local,” Damian points out.
“Their English program is, there are better places to go if I want to study that, ones that make it easier to move onto graduate school.”
“Different colleges have better programs?” Damian frowns.
Jason shakes his head. “It’s maybe more that different colleges have different specialties?”
Damian sits back as he considers this.
“Do you want to go to college?” Jason asks.
Damian reaches for his eraser again. “I fail to see how that has a bearing on this conversation.”
“What would you want to major in?” Jason prods. “We can look up schools right now.”
“That is unnecessary,” Damian glares.
“Come on, I can live vicariously through you, it’ll be fun!” Jason teases with faux cheer.
Damian rolls his eyes, obviously recognizing the tone Jason is using.
“It’s a moot point if I’m going to become Batman,” Damian points out.
Jason almost points out that Cass will likely have the position covered, or one of the others can step in and cover it if Bruce needs a break and Damian is in school. Except that would almost be like making going to college a task for Damian to maintain his secret identity, and not because he wants the education.
“No expectation of becoming Batman, what would you want to major in?” Jason challenges.
Damian stares at him, then answers carefully, “I’m young. I could easily change my interests between now and then.”
“You already have degrees,” Jason points out. “What’s caught your interest?”
“Jon’s grandparents arranged for me to spend the day following a vet,” Damian answers. “It was…I felt like I learned a lot.”
“And you haven’t had that feeling in awhile?”
Damian opens his mouth to answer, then snaps it closed. He huffs. “Not in the same way. It was satisfying and left me wanting to know more.”
“Then why are we sitting in here when we could be looking up vet programs?”
“My future’s already decided,” Damian protests as he settles back.
Jason wants to point out how young Damian is. Will that even make a difference? Not with Damian. So instead he tries, “We can always ask Steph about balancing college and being a vigilante. You already know how that works with going to school, but she might have a different perspective.”
“I’m not going too…” Damian starts and then pauses. He shakes his head.
“What?” Jason prods. “Share.”
“She’ll probably find reasons we need to visit every zoo, aquarium, and sanctuary in the area,” Damian points out. Damian’s on the verge of wanting that, Jason can tell by his expression. Is there an aquarium nearby? Do they have time to go?
“Not just in the area,” Jason points out. “We’ve got access to means of travel that most people don’t, especially if you include Jon.”
Damian wants that, Jason suspects in a moment Damian is going to find a laptop and start plotting which ones he wants to visit the most. Maybe even make a spreadsheet. Maybe they should get Tim involved? Tim is great at spreadsheets.
“Will,” Damian starts, then stops. He shakes his head. “Would Father be disappointed if I don’t want to be Batman?”
Jason considers giving a flippant response. Does Bruce even want to think about when he’ll have to stop being Batman? “I think he’d rather you be happy, than you feel you’re obligated to be a vigilante.”
Damian considers this a moment, then asks, “Then why aren’t you in college?”
It’s Jason’s turn to snap his mouth shut. He drums his fingers against his book again and stares.
Damian stands and brushes off his pants, then picks up his sketchbook. He turns to look at Jason. “Are we looking up GED programs or colleges for you?”
“I…” Jason starts, then stalls out on his protests because he’s remembering how much he’d wanted college.
“You’re not that much older than me,” Damian points out.
“I’m a decade older than you,” Jason protests.
“I’m ten,” Damian deadpans.
“Almost eleven,” Jason manages.
Damian raises his eyebrows. “I don’t see how that has any bearing at us looking at you going back to school. People decades older than you go back to school and get degrees.”
“That’s true,” Jason concedes.
“Pennyworth isn’t getting any younger though,” Damian continues. “And he was probably looking forward to seeing you graduate, Father too.”
Jason sets his book on the side table he’s put his annotating supplies on. He wants that too. He’d thought wanting Alfred and Bruce at his graduation was a thing for past him, the child he stopped being a long time ago, but Damian is right, that’s something he can still want, that’s something he can still have. It can become one less thing that was taken from him.
Jason manages to nod as he stands. “Yeah, okay. Thanks.”
Damian glances up at him. “You as well. Thank you.”
Jason manages a smile to reflect the soft one Damian is offering. “Let's go find my laptop.”